Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Shoe Disdain

Last Saturday I found myself marooned in the Nordstrom Shoe Department with Amy & Darcie. We buzzed around looking at all the new chic styles, many of which defied imagination and practicality. The shoes that got me excited were the European Ergo shoes of Ecco, Dansko, Mephisto---and of course, only the black ones. I think it's safe to say, my relationship with "fashionable" shoes is over.

Many girlfriends say to me when wearing leg contorting, stride altering foot fashion, "...but these are really comfortable." Yeah, well I don't believe you. I know you want to think they are. But you never thought you'd actually pay that much for an impared ability to walk and pain like that. It's not hard to guess why models look so angst-ridden. Besides not eating, they have to walk around in uncomfortable shoes all day while everyone's looking at them.

But let's get one thing straight, I am not a proponent of Birkenstocks or Crocs. My mother staged a psyche-scarring event one Christmas when she placed a gift of mine in a Birkenstocks box but weighted it like there were Birks in there and wrapped it. (Mother, I will exact my revenge one day, mark my words.) What's my beef? Birks are hideous and Crocs can be washed in the dishwasher. Which brings up issues of sanitation. But that's another topic...

Back at Nordstrom, there were so many people trying on shoes last Saturday, you had to weave through the boxes and the bodies with ace precision for fear of bumping into someone strutting around in 4 inch heels. Did you know that Jessica Simpson has her own ...how do I say... "ghetto fabulous" line of shoes? Definitely a sign of the coming apocalypse. This day also marks the first time I got to inspect Manolo Blahnik and Jimmy Choo shoes for myself. I'm sorry ladies, I know I sound like a traitor to all of woman-kind but what's the big deal? Six hundred dollars for a pair of strappy festive heels?

It's all about priorities I guess.

No comments: